Q. What is a Yankee ?

A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone .

 

Only In America ......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

 

how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Well, only 2 but I don't know how they get in there.

 

Working on cars isn't like a box of chocolates, it's like a bottle of hot sauce. What half-a**ed repairs you make today, could burn your a** tomorrow.

 

Gambling:
When I go to casinos, the most ridiculouse sign I see is the one
that says ... " If you have a gambling problem
Call 1-800-GAMBLER."

So , I called them and said, " I have an Ace and a Six. The dealer
has a Seven. What do I do.?

 

Two friends graduated from high school and enter the info each other to self. Over 50 years meet.
The self:
- Ma, I made superbeton cars, speed, etc..
Most of the info:
- Ma, I have great computer company ... and know that if I did cars were 10 times better than yours!
The self:
- If you make your car, you put your car brakes, asking, "ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT 2 DO THIS?"

 

Me to come up with another one so here I am with
another one

Your dog's barking at the back door. Your wife's
barking at the front. Who do you let in?

Well , it's your call .... but the dog'll stop
barking when you let him in.

WheelBrokerAng

click the image!

 

good jokes man. I Really enjoyed this thread. Thanks for sharing that.

 

If you've had a bad day think of this poor guy:

A women came home to find her husband in the kitchen
shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy...he had some
kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle.
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she wacked
him with a handy plank of wood-breaking his arm in two places.
Up to that moment , he had been Happily listening to his Walkman

WheelBrokerAng
Please Click The Image !

 

I updated it for ya Angelo, just in case the youngsters on here don't know what a Walkman is...