**JOKES here (Funny/KLEEN, Oneliners & Short Stories)**
Here Comes Some New Stuff Folks
Only in America ...do drug stores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy their cigarettes at the front . Ever Wonder....why women can't put on mascara with their mouths closed?Or
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?Or
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?
* OH OH...Here They Come Again Folks**
RedNeck Computer Glossary " Keyboard" - Place to hang your truck keys.
" Hard Drive" - Trying to climb a steep, muddy hill with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.
" Window" - Place in the truck to hang your guns.
"Modem" - How you get rid of your dandelions.
" ROM " - Delicious when you mix it with Coca Cola.
" Byte" - First word in a kiss-off phrase.
" Reboot" - What you do when the first pair gets covered with barnyard stuff.
"Mouse" - Fuzzy little thing you stuff in your beer bottle in order to get a free case of beer.
" Lan " - To borrow as in, " Hey Delbert! Lan me your truck."
" Cursor " - What some guys do when they are mad at their wife or girlfriend.
" bit " - A wager as in, " I bit you kan't spit that there watermelon seed across the porch."
" Digital Control" - What your fingers do on the TV remote.
AND
" Packet" -
What you do to a suitcase or Wal-Mart bag before you take a trip.Your welcome very much...
Okay-Okay..Here Are A Few More
Deep Thought Series: Don't Take Life Too Seriously!
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Depression is mearly anger without enthusiasm.
99 % of Lawyers give the rest a bad name.
And how about :
Save the wales. Collect the whole set.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Depression is mearly anger without enthusiasm.
99 % of Lawyers give the rest a bad name.
And how about :
Save the wales. Collect the whole set.
* More Deep Thought's From Last Session**
OK,.... so what's the speed of dark?
Hard worK pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Why do Psychics have to ask for your name?
Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
Click the image please!
Hard worK pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Why do Psychics have to ask for your name?
Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.
Click the image please!
